Part I
1. A dream come true by a prayer of tears
2. I complete it by love of action
3. An artist must draw even if he/she is angry
4. The braised spicy chicken which was the most delicious chicken I tasted in the whole world.
5. The luxury car that is suitable to me the most
1. A Dream Come True by a Prayer of Tears
Originally my childhood dream was to become a writer. When I was in elementary school, the area behind the apartment I used to live in was surrounded by nature like a mountain, a small lake, and a small sea. There was a small lock at the entrance to the mountain. To write and meditate while looking down through the village is one of my own happy pleasures. There was a motivation for me to want to be a painter who I have dreamed of.
When I was in fifth grade, I met a newly appointed teacher who is pretty, humorous, and good at painting. She was very good at drawing, and she drew each character of classmates on eggs on Easterâas many as 50 students or moreâand distributed them as a present. One day, at the time of art class, she told me that I was good at painting and talented much better than the other kids in art class. It was the first time I came to know that I had a talent in painting. When I was in the sixth grade, the homeroom teacher also said the same thing during the art class time. He said, âDo you know by any chance you draw better than the other children? Youâd better to be a painter. I hope that you keep on going towards Art in the future.â
I started to draw pictures fully because of the advice I received from teachers. When my faith began to deepen when I turned 16 years old, my dream had not changed. Whenever I came back home late it was because I was taking a drawing class for preparation to enter a University. I earnestly prayed gazing at the night sky with tears. âLord, Please help me to be a witness of the Lord through paintings.â
Even though I didnât know what testifying with paintings for the Lord meant, strangely I prayed for that every day. I have been living forgetting myself of that time, but I now come to clearly know that my dream has come true according to that prayer. Now, all of a sudden, I realized that the Lord listened to my prayer of tears at that time and led me to the path where I can fulfill that dream. It is my most desired wish to testify for the Lord and express Godâs heart with brushes because life is a passing moment and life is short.
2. I Complete It by Love of Action
I truly had so many obstacles with Satans when I held the Hell exhibitions through YouTube. After all the twists and turns, I only had time to edit images. Suddenly, editing images ceased altogether because of some unavoidable reasons. To make matters worse, even my body got severely sick. While drawing Hell pictures, my body kept getting sick so I even received surgery. It made me more sick. My face was covered with terrible zits, so I came to hate looking at myself in the mirror. Literally, sufferings of Hell started to surge in.
âI started Hell exhibitions for Heaven and to save lives, but now why am I sick like this and lying down? People who are next to me are all gone somewhere, and why am I alone like this living a wretched life?â I felt myself to be just like Job who lost everything in one morning. Nonetheless, I surely wanted to complete Hell exhibition at least. I wanted to make sure to prevail over Satans who block that Hell from being declared on earth, and I wanted to make sure to fulfill the Lordâs wish, which is saving lives through Hell exhibitions.
Leading with my sick body, I barely managed to wrap up the Hell exhibition on August 2, 2013, and I opened Hell exhibition in the end. Since I finished the Hell exhibition, one thought came to me, which was that I should do a Heaven exhibition, but I could not make this determination easily. My fiery faith and also my love towards Heaven cooled down because of ongoing pain. However, I thought that I must keep a promise with Heaven by surely holding a Heaven exhibition.
When I prayed about the Heaven exhibition and what I should do when I could only lay down, I heard the voice of God with a deep realization within my heart.
âI, Jehovah, am another word for Heaven, am I not? I, Jehovah, am also Love, so Heaven is another word for Love. Therefore, work that informs about Heaven can be completed by only your love toward Me.â Although fiery love had not sprung up, I drew Heaven quietly in order to keep the promise with Heaven. In spite of having a sick body, I eventually completed it. Since I opened graphic communication to the world, I remembered that circumstance at that time. âEven though I didn’t have fiery love, how come has this video completed? God said that it is going to be completed with Love, but I lacked in Love.â At that moment, I heard the voice of realization like this in my heart:
âIt is right that it is completed by love. There are several kinds of love. Confessing love in a fiery way while smiling âI Love Godâ is not only love, but also love that keeps the promise with God in the middle of difficulties like you. Taking action is a tremendous love of action for the sake of giving what God wants even though it is hard and difficult. Hence, it is right itâs completed by love.â
My heart was so moved. I could not draw Heavenâs overflowing grace and joy because of my weakened body and mind. However, I wanted to fulfill the will of God, and I drew pictures with the earnest heart wishing many people can be led to Heaven by introducing a world of Heaven.
I realized that love that we dedicate in front of God varies, but not only with the word, but also love of actionâmatured love that you keep the promiseâis big love in Godâs eyes.
3. An Artist Must Draw Even If He/She Is Angry
(In Korean, artist and angry word are the same spelling)
An artist has a tendency to have his own definite perspectives and strong ego mostly in order to express his thinking and philosophy through arts and pictures. Furthermore, independence and self-satisfaction also are plentiful since they express their feeling and thinking in them to their heartâs content through pictures. However, Heavenly pictures are different than any other regular drawings, so I need a new mind and attitude.
Heavenly painting is not painting what I want but what the Lord wants. So if I start to draw according to my thinking, the Lord is not drawing with me anymore. As if a brush looks like it is drawing, but hands move the brush. The subject has to be only the Lord who moves the hands, even if it looks like the hands draw freely.
If a brush goes to the wrong place other than where the hands want to go, you cannot paint as you wish. Therefore, a brush in hand must be in rhythm well with the hand and must be very obedient. Thus, emptying myself is the most important thing to do so that the Lord is able to draw through me directly if I want to draw heavenly pictures. And also, even though a satisfying picture is completed, confess, âI am not the one who drew it but the Lord drew through me.â I must be thankful with modesty and without any conceit.
Additionally, you must concentrate your mind a couple times more since Heavenly pictures must contain the Lordâs deep heart and spiritual things. While doing it, the entire body gets stiff easily due to tensions. So big satisfactions existed, but sometimes I wanted to sit down because it was too hard. Whenever I feel that, I overcome the limitation while thinking one teaching that I learned.
It said, âAn artist must draw even if you are angry.â This philosophy was taught to me through the pastor who is my mentor. Since the pastor also works as an artist, the Holy Son Lord gives him a lot of fundamental teaching about pictures, so he said the words to me as well. âAn artist must paint even if angry. Even though you are angry, you must keep drawing.â
In the beginning, I could not understand it well. However, when I drew diligently to the extremeâover the level that you draw on averageâthatâs the moment it came to me. It was so hard so it made me angry because I faced limitations. At that time, I kept drawing engraving the teaching, âYou must draw even if you are angry.â So that word meant: âDo not put the brush down in any circumstance, even for a moment. Do not rest. Instead, keep drawing. If you do so, you will surpass limitations more and more and you will reach a higher stage.â
I realized what that meant. If that teaching did not exist, I would have given up because I faced limitations by countless difficulties while drawing spiritual Heavenly pictures. Through one sentence, one teaching, I became a heavenly artist who has a really wonderful habit in which I never put down the brush even for a moment. And everything is thus. I realized deeply. Even if it is hard, if you do it steadily until the end, you will surely fulfill it.
4. The Braised Spicy Chicken Which Was the Most Delicious Chicken I Tasted in the Whole World
It is a story about when I went to Europe for sightseeing in 2008.I went there for the purpose of art traveling with juniors who draw pictures. The first place I traveled to was France. The main purpose for sightseeing in France was to visit the Louvre and Orsay museums. Visiting French museums gave me tremendous expectations and excitement since my wish was to use my talent all the time to draw the pictures that God wants me to draw. While in France, I stayed at a private Korean house. Because I didn’t have enough money for a backpacking trip, I got an inexpensive private house, and I was in a situation where I had to save food costs as much as possible.
In the beginning, I was happy because I was hooked on flour saying, âFrench bread is so tasty!â However, not too long later, I started to miss Korean foods so much. Breakfasts were cereal and milkâthat’s what I always had. Since I ate that for a couple days, I came to hate the smell of flour, so I was not eager to eat breakfast. Even though I wanted to eat out, it was hard to find Korean restaurants, and it was a luxury for us because the price was expensive.
After we finished preparing to go out, we gathered together and prayed. We were about to go out from the private lodging place when we saw a white piano which looked a little bit old at the corners. On top of the piano, there was a hymnal and several gospel books. Since we saw them, we wanted to sing some praise. That’s why I played the piano and the three of us gave a praise graciously, and afterward we started to travel.
In order to save money, we made mixed rice balls with rice we got from the private lodging house. We sat down on the park bench in the middle of the street and ate lunch while putting red pepper paste in the rice balls. We were in a miserable condition. We missed Korean food so much, and especially, we kept singing wanting to have braised spicy chicken. We handled the very tight travel schedule, and dinner time came. We entered into the private lodging place with exhausted bodies. Upon opening the entrance door, we smelled the aroma of tasty braised spicy chicken. We ran to the second floor and went to look at the table. Braised spicy chicken was there. Was there braised spicy chicken this delicious in the world? We were so delighted.
We heard a story while eating the braised spicy chicken. There was an old woman who lives at the highest floor of the private lodging house and is the owner’s mother. She was not well, and especially on this particular day, her body was so sick. However, in the morning she heard the praising sound sung by several women with piano accompaniment coming from the first floor. Afterward, her condition improved a lot. When she learned that we were the women singing praises, she offered to make the delicious braised spicy chicken for us.
I felt so moved. Giving small glory to God by praising gave the grace of healing to a person who had a sick body, and it brought happiness to us as well. The Lord receives the joy that we give, and He repays us tens of times or a couple hundred of times with joy.
God receives even one small glory we give in daily life valuably, and I experienced the true taste of life because of the Lord’s love, through which He takes care of even our small wishes delicately.
5. The Luxury Car That Is Suitable to Me the Most
I used to decorate the altar of the church with flowers for five years since 2005. This is the story of 2005 when I started arranging flowers for the chapel. In winter 2005, I was walking to the bus stop from the florist shop, which was a half an hour walking distance, with an armful of flowers as usual. My arms were throbbing with the weight of the flowers, but the strong wind and unceasing snow that were very severe on that day made it much harder.
I was anxious lest flowers would be frozen by the cold wave. It’s getting difficult to take a step in the gust of wind and large snowflakes that hindered my visibility. I began to talk to God while I kept the flowers warm with my body temperature, holding them in my bosom closer as the wind blew harder.
âGod!~ itâs too cold and too hard. Above all else, Iâm so worried about these precious flowers that will decorate the altar. God~ please buy me a car. It would be enough only if flowers can be carried safely. I will be more than happy even if it’s a small used car since it’s going to be my first car. White color and equipped with audio system would be much better cause I like to listen to music, the price range are ooo. I’m sure you would buy me one?â
Even I think it over, it was a very detailed prayer. I was told that we should pray specifically and meticulously like getting into a conversation one by one, and now it’s my habit of praying so whatever it is. Although icy wind kept coming into my mouth, my conversation with Heaven thawed the winter, and I became numb to the pain from the cold. The next day, one of my close friends from the church called me and said, âWhy don’t you buy a used car? Call this used car dealer whom I know very well.â
It was truly amazing. It was as if she knew my situation. When I called there, he asked me to come right away saying there’s a nice car for the woman to drive that just came in to his car dealer. When I got there and looked at it, I said, âOh! my my!! It’s a white clean small car with an audio system and within my price range that I prayed for yesterday.â
The dealer said that I wouldn’t regret it if I purchased this car because it had been driven by a woman in Seoul only for commuting and had no car accident in the past. Indeed, this car hasn’t had any breakdown since and always carried my flowers safely. It may look like a common used car to others, but to me this is a very meaningful gift from God. Even though it’s not an expensive fancy car, it helps me to do God’s work. Above all, God gave me what I wished for, so is there anything more valuable than this?
The world valuates everything with the price, and the value of luxury goods depends on the price tag. However, the things that God gives can’t be priced nor be differentiated big from small. It’s because everything is a gift of love from God.
Likewise, God doesn’t price what we offer to Him. He only receives them as âlove,â no matter how big or small they are. Life is cumulating those memories of love that we exchanged with God one by one while being accompanied by Him. Isn’t it why He created this world and usâin hopes of bona fide, beautiful love from us?